Slow start, but a start nonetheless

I started out on my return to 4/8 with a short foray at the Venetian. It took 5 hours to get started (maybe I shouldn't go at noon on a wednesday), but when it did it was REALLY good, and I felt extremely comfortable. I had forgotten how comfortable I was at 4/8 when I played last year and how uncomfortable I felt at 1/2 NL. I only played for an hour or so, but was up 85 and very happy with my start.

A few days later I went for my first "targetted" night out at 4/8. It was a thursday night and I had to decide where the good games were going to be. After my experience at the Venetian I decided their game selection on non-weekends was very lacking. I knew from my dealer friends at the Rio there 4/8 games were virtually non-existant except on the weekends during the summer months (a habitually slow time for poker). MGM and Station are rock gardens at 4/8 due to the 2/4 sucking up the fish and the fact that a lot of the "regulars" play there. The other harrah casinos don't really offer 4/8. The only places in town that seem to have regular 4/8 going are the Wynn and Bellagio. I picked the Wynn for my first night out since it was easier to get in and out of the parking garage, and their comps are better.

I started out in an immediate hole, a REALLY REALLY big problem I have. I am all excited to play, pumped up with adreneline and ready to make some money. So I immediately start bluffing, and reraising with air. Of course I get called since I have no image at the table and quickly was down 100. I missed a few draws and was down to 50 and then finally started going back up before running into the luck box of a calling station sitting to my right. He hits 2 freaking runner runner draws and ends up stacking me after about 2.5 hours of play. I left a little frustrated... I got some bad luck, but a good portion of it I brought about on myself by overplaying many hands, and trying to get to creative. I have to relearn that 4/8 and limit in general is a game of patience.

I took a few days off to reconsider my play and readdress my bankroll... I went back on wednesday and decided that despite the horrid parking at the Bellagio (The only entrance is on the strip in the middle of Flamingo and Tropicana a horrible place to be on the strip at) the reviews of the games were that they were really good.... so I had to give it a try to judge for myself. Well the games at the B were absolutely amazing. It took me about 30 mins to get in, but the game was insanely good. 7-8 players for 2 bets pre-flop and then 5 of them folding on the flop. I don't know what hands 5 players could have that could not call one bet getting 14 or 16 to 1 on the flop. Any 2 overcards, any gutshot, etc... even back door flush draws with an over should probably call. They folded which meant more dead money to win in the pot and that made the pots huge with few people vying for them. Everyone at the table was for the most part a very simple straightforward player. They bet with top pair, check/called with draws and cold-called with 2nd pair. Bluffing was not an option but winning with top pair seemed to work well. After just 2 hours I was up over 200 and decided not to push my luck and called it a night.

I couldn't have been happier all night having played extremely well, read all the people at the table perfectly, and really established a confidence in my game I had been lacking. I of course HAD to go back the next night. Now this is where I tend to have a problem... confidence from a session of poker is often wrapped up in your image at the table, knowing the players, adjusting to the attitude of the table, etc... None of these things carry over from one session to another... however my attitude didn't change. I hit the table the 2nd night all full of confidence and expected everyone to just roll over. Unfortunately they were not there the night before and didn't realize *I* was suppose to win... and I didn't. I immediately lost 200 in about 45 mins and rebought for 200 more (after all I am exceptionally good at this game and they just have to realize it then I will start winning). I hit a monster hand with set over set and get back to almost even before a few more hands bring me back up over even.... a monster comeback and I am once again on cloud nine. Unfortunately as I was about to leave after about 4 hours of play I got a pretty nasty bad beat and was back down to even.... I didn't want to go home even (it felt like such a waste of time), so I tried to win one more hand to get back up... then I got another bad beat and was down... so now I started to try even harder to win... now I am down 200 and pissed off... so I try even more... now I am down 300 and upset and don't want to admit I lost 300 at 4/8 in an hour.. so I play even more aggressive... now I am down 400 and out of money and have to go home broke. I managed to turn an even or minor win night into a 400 dollar loss without even really breaking a sweat.

It is really very frustrating. It is so painful to just sit there and stew in your misery knowing it is all your fault, and totally under your control but being unable to do anything about it. There is so much self-control in poker and if you don't master your emotions and attitude you can do nothing but lose.

On an even more depressing note... There is only one more week left of my step-daughter's visit for the summer. Clarese is leaving on August 2nd and we are trying to squeze in every last thing we can do before she goes. It is really very sad that she is going to be going home soon.... The house definately won't be the same with just Estie. Noone to tell us what she won't eat and have to get plain cheeseburger's if we try something new so she won't starve (poor child must be from a 3rd world country the way she starves sooo often).

Saturday was a big day for all of us as Clarese had a casting call for a hollywood producer. We aren't getting our hopes up too high as there were a lot of kids there, but she did get a lot of very positive feedback and is very excited about doing more acting auditions and getting her face in front of some cameras.

All in all it has been a rocky start but a good one.... it is a tough job being a poker player, and one which does not really work well when you aren't in the right frame of mind. I swear I may have to look into these mind exercises to relax and put you in the right state of mind. Yoga? meditation? something? who knows...